The eCrozier

I am away on silent retreat this week. In my silence and prayer I have discovered something new. Well, it is not exactly new. Like the Preacher of Ecclesiastes, we can all say: “there is nothing new under the sun.” But I have rediscovered a truth about myself and my hunch is that it is probably a universal human truth. The truth is I have trouble staying in the present; of welcoming the gift of the now; of being radically accepting of what God has given me in this present time.

Like so many, I spend an inordinate amount of time looking backward trying to fix what has been, whether that be in myself or in others. Of course, that is a fool’s errand, but it does not stop us from seeking to do it. I look backward and say: “If so-and-so had been just a bit nicer, or more open, or more loving, then things would have better.” I add a bit of self-examination to the mix and also say: “If I had been just a bit nicer, or more open, or more loving, then things would have better.” While such reflection is edifying to a point, it can also be spiritually paralyzing because it can delude us into believing we can fix the past, especially other people. And it can distract us from the gift of what God is doing in the present.

The same is true if we inordinately look to the future. We can get fixated on our schemes. Or, we can become enamored with the belief that what is coming must certainly be better than what is now. That may of course be true. We call that hope and hope will not fail us. I am not talking about hope though in this context. Rather, I am referring to that tendency in us that is impatient and manipulative; that desires to have God take a seat off to the side so we can program the future coming of the Kingdom. This, too, distracts us from God’s gift of today.

Church leaders need to look back to learn from where we have been. We need to look forward to discern where God may well be leading us. All that is meet and right so to do. But let’s be careful not to make such looking inordinate for if we do we may well miss the gift of God for the now. Maybe the best definition we could have of our faith is “the radical acceptance of the sacramental presence of Christ in the present.” God is working God’s purpose out in your life and my life today. That is faith. God is revealing our Savior Christ to us in the frail instrumentality of this day. Let us be mindful right now of such a revelation of grace.

+Scott